ET in Drag

The Day I saw a Space Alien in Drag

.........at the Beverly Hills Affaire in the Garden ....................................................a year ago last May

A gasp alerted me. I turned and saw...the creature. At first, it appeared to be just another anorexic Beverly Hills Rich Bitch, clad unattractively in an orange cat suit too tight for the short, pencil-thin body, 4-inch heeled boots that no sane woman would wear to walk around a 2-acre grassy park, too much makeup and an overdone wig. I realized what everyone else did that day, that this was not what appeared at first glance.

There was an ATMOSPHERE around this being. We didn't understand at first what we were seeing. Only upon later reflection did it occur to me that the person we saw was not from here.

Everyone in the crowd fell silent and stared as the creature and its escort walked through us. We are not a bunch of yokels. This is Greater Los Angeles. We sophisticated. We are inured to freaks. This was no ordinary freak.

Click picture to view transformation from space alien to space alien disguised as a woman. I took a photo of an allegedly dead alien photographed by one Dr. Reed. I then added makeup, wig, clothes, etc. You can see the transformation and understand how it could happen.

The escort, a well-built, handsome, appropriately-dressed man, was no ordinary Beverly Hills Rich Bitch's gigelo. He walked about three paces behind, never speaking to his companion. While the creature glanced at the crafts for sale and at people, he studyied the crowd the way the Secret Service guys did when Andy and Fergie visited UCLA about 10 years earlier. It was unclear if he was guarding the creature from us, or us from the creature. He looked capable of ripping the pin out of a hand grenade with his teeth, or taking out a flying saucer with his experimental fighter jet before touching down again, back in Area 51.

Upon later reflection, I realized that what I had first attributed to bad taste, was actually part of the disguise. The heavy foundation hid the natural gray or green of its complexion. The lipstick painted around the mouth was meant to give the impression of lips where none existed. The wrap-around aviator-style sunglasses with the dark black lenses hid the creature's buglike black eyes. The giant, flamboyant wig with the long hair and top layer of Bo-Derek braids distracted attention from the huge cranium. The long thick bangs in front reached down far enough to cover the brow ridges, had the creature any eyebrows.

The skin-tight orange cat suit was a bad choice, in my opinion. No human being, however anorexic, is THAT skinny. Something looser would have obscured the unnatural thinness and narrowness of the body in relation to the head. The turtle neck, however, was wise. It, along with the wig hair, hid the impossibly thin neck. I was not convinced by the appearance of breasts pushing forth in front. Any horney 16-year old male understands that a pair of rolled-up gym sox stuffed into a bra can fake boobies.

No human woman would have walked around that 2-acre grass-covered park in 4-inch heels. If she had been foolish enough to start out in high heels, she'd have been carrying the in short order. I came to understand that the heels were meant to increase height. I regret that I did not have a chance to look at the hands. I'd be willing to bet there were four fingers on each, with suction organs at the ends.

It was really the ATMOSPHERE, the air of complete unearthly strangeness around this being that tipped me off that it, she, was not from here. I surmise that this is some kind of extraterrestrial Margaret Mead, studying the primitive aboriginal cultures of earth.